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[icon] this was a shitty, shitty weekend. today was the icing on the cake.… - my garden of simple
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Time:09:46 pm
this was a shitty, shitty weekend. today was the icing on the cake. work was hell. people are assholes and don't konw how to tip. aimie's is going to hell in a handbasket without raina and rob. last night, the 8:40 show didn't start until 9:05. people were pissed. i made no money. it sucked. and then today, when i thought that i was just going to pop into work to get my calculator, they ended up needing me because josh dudley didn't show up for work. not even a phone call...mutherfucker. so i was at aimie's for 9 hours today. also, the waitstaff was not in the best of spirits (raina, have i got some stories for you!).

then. i saw josh at the bar when i was going home. WHY??!??!?!?! why would he go there when he knows i work sundays? does he miss me? is he fucking with my head? maybe he doesn't realize that everytime i see him i breakdown. i sat in my car for 10 or so minutes after i left and just cried and screamed and hit my dashboard, and wanted to see josh, and wanted things to have not changed and fucked up my life, and i wanted him to come to my car and hold me and kiss me and tell me that he misses me, and only wants one more night together. i can't concentrate on school. i can't find time to do anything i want. i don't have my own space. i should have ended things with josh this summer when things were just starting to get bad. this shitty timing is really taking its toll.

i know things happen for a reason. i know things will get better/easier eventually. but right now i'm barely hanging on to normalcy. everyone says how great i'm doing for having just ended a serious relationship - how great it is that the breakup was so mutual. but it still hurts like hell. i still miss josh. fuck it, i still love josh. but i know i'm better off without him. i just want to leave this town and do my own thing, and not have to see the ghosts of our relationship around every corner.

... i guess i'll go do some calculus now since i have a test tomorrow.

fuck this shit.
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n_elisbeth
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Time:2005-10-10 04:28 pm (UTC)
Oh I'm sorry to hear you're having such a rough time. Wish I had had a chance to talk with you this weekend.
I want you know that if you want to give me a call during the week to talk you most certainly can and I'll call you right back. Even if its the middle of the night for you, it's only 9:00pm for me.
Take care.
:-) Nelbo
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hybridbreakdown
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Time:2005-10-10 05:16 pm (UTC)
Call me, love. I got a new battery for my cellular device, so it won't cut out on us, and you won't have to call my room. You can reach me anytime. Also, think about how we'll be seeing each other soon and visiting our friends at Wells. It'll be so fun. I know things may seem hopeless right now, but eventually you will see the light at the end of the tunnel. (Corny, I know, but true)

I love you,

n-money

p.s. I got my junior mug. It's AWESOME.
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hybridbreakdown
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Time:2005-10-12 03:55 am (UTC)
dude

you were right

it is the guy from seinfeld who plays joe

good call :)
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wehavethis
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Time:2005-10-13 03:16 am (UTC)
haha! i freakin knew it! as soon as i heard him say "lets get it on!" i knew... :D sweeet
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waterbaby83
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Time:2005-10-12 04:06 pm (UTC)
well i guess i had better call you missy cause i am home now!!!
looove you
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[icon] this was a shitty, shitty weekend. today was the icing on the cake.… - my garden of simple
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